Ever feel like you’re just going through the motions with others? Here’s how small acts of ... More cooperation can help your relationships thrive.getty As adults, building and maintaining meaningful connections can feel like an uphill battle. Between work, family and the constant juggle of daily responsibilities, finding the time and emotional energy to nurture relationships can seem impossible. Social circles often become smaller and it becomes all too easy to fall into a routine of just going through the motions, without forming the deeper connections we long for. Even if we do make the effort to meet new people, building those initial bonds can feel more daunting than ever. However, classical research shows that social support is essential for overall well-being. There are two key ways it can impact us: one is the “main effect” model, where simply having a strong social network improves mental and physical health. The other is the “buffering model,” which highlights how social support can protect us from the harmful effects of stress. While the significance of connection is clear, the reality of making and maintaining those connections is often more challenging. Finding common ground with new people, overcoming social barriers and sustaining those early bonds can be difficult, especially as life gets busier. But the good news is, you don’t need grand gestures to build closeness. Sometimes, it’s the smallest acts of kindness and cooperation that open the door to meaningful relationships. These altruistic gestures can create deeper connections and promote a cycle of mutual support. Here are two research-backed ways to help spark connections or deepen existing relationships through the power of altruism. 1. Bonding Through Coordinated Tasks When you work with others toward a shared goal, something special happens. There’s this natural feeling of connection that forms, whether it’s helping a friend move, playing a team sport or collaborating on a project. The effort of coordinating with each other creates a sense of togetherness, as you start to understand each other’s intentions and movements without needing to say much. This connection isn’t just about getting the task done, though. It often leads to something deeper, like wanting to help or support the other person more, even beyond the task at hand. You start to feel more connected and more willing to support one another. A 2017 study published in Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience explored this idea using brain imaging to see how synchronized brain activity during coordinated tasks influences social bonds. Researchers found that when two people worked together on a task, their brains showed remarkable synchronization. Specifically, an area of the brain linked to understanding others lit up, suggesting they were mentally in sync with each other. This brain synchronization was tied to an increase in mutual prosocial behavior. The more in tune the participants were with each other during the task, the more likely they were to show kindness and cooperation afterward. This just goes to show how working together on something, even in a small way, can lead to stronger and more positive connections. Whether it’s strengthening existing bonds or forming new ones, incorporating small moments of shared effort can foster that same kind of alignment. Here are a few ways you can incorporate this into your relationships. Nurturing existing relationships. Try activities including collaborative creative projects (painting a mural, designing a scrapbook), shared wellness routines (yoga or group walks) or cooking a meal together. Building new bonds in professional or social settings. Seek out opportunities to collaborate in low-pressure, engaging ways. This could mean participating in a volunteer event where you and others work toward a common goal, tackling a group project at work with a spirit of curiosity rather than competition or brainstorming ideas with new colleagues to pave the way for deeper connections. Making new friends. Consider joining classes or communities where collaboration is part of the experience, like art workshops, fitness classes or volunteer groups. By simply showing up and engaging in these everyday collaborations, you’re creating space for deeper understanding and support to naturally unfold. So, whether you’re reconnecting with someone or meeting someone new, remember — it’s often the little things done together that lay the foundation for meaningful relationships. 2. Bonding Through Meaningful Favors When you think about ways to strengthen your relationships, asking for help might not be the first thing that comes to mind. It can feel uncomfortable or like you’re imposing. However, research suggests that asking for a favor can enhance the bond between you and others. The study touches on a fascinating psychological concept known as “amae,” which is a Japanese term referring to the desire to be indulged or dependent on others for emotional support or affection. It’s rooted in the idea that allowing oneself to rely on others and requesting help from them can strengthen the bond between individuals. In the experiment, both Japanese and American participants were asked to help a confederate (a person acting as part of the study, not a real participant) and in return, were measured for how they felt about the confederate after the interaction. The results showed that when participants were directly asked for help, they experienced an increase in liking toward the confederate, as well as a greater sense of closeness and a more sociable impression of them. This was a critical finding because it suggests that even though you may think of asking for help as a vulnerable act, it creates a sense of connection. The act of needing someone and showing vulnerability can encourage people to feel more positively about the requester. The sense of dependence and the act of helping, in this case, are mutually reinforcing: the person asking for help appreciates the support and the person giving it feels a sense of importance and appreciation, which creates a stronger emotional bond. So, instead of shying away from asking for support, consider how these small moments of vulnerability can serve as gentle bridges between you and the people in your life. When done sincerely and sparingly, these requests invite connection and signal trust — two powerful ingredients in any close relationship. Here are some thoughtful ways to use this in your day-to-day life: Ask a friend to review something you’ve written or created. Take a review of perhaps a post, a resume or even a message you’re unsure about. You can also involve them in your creative process, asking for feedback or ideas. This signals trust and appreciation, helping the other person feel that you value their opinion. Request help with something small but specific. It could be something as small as choosing between two outfits or picking a gift. People often love to weigh in and feel helpful. Let them know you appreciate their check-ins. If you’re having a tough day or feeling low, emotional support is a powerful connector. Invite someone to teach you something they’re good at. Even if it’s small, it only makes them feel seen, creating space for learning and a shared experience. The goal isn’t just to take, but to open a door to more meaningful interaction. As you practice this, you’ll find that asking genuinely and respectfully can lead to a deeper sense of connection that benefits both of you. It’s important to remember that relationships thrive on mutuality, so do not hesitate to offer help in return. It’s this gentle give-and-take that builds trust and emotional closeness over time. When you act from a place of sincerity and recognize the value in both giving and receiving, you’ll create lasting bonds that go far beyond surface-level interactions. Do you feel seen and supported? Take this science-backed test to find out how connected you feel to others: Social Connectedness Scale