Just when you thought the world of Pokémon couldn't get any more... magical, a brand new Pokémon park is set to breathe life back into the beloved Kanto region. Because, you know, what could possibly be better than pretending to be a trainer in a glorified amusement park? Forget real-life responsibilities; it’s time to catch 'em all while avoiding the existential dread of adulthood.

Imagine the thrill of stepping into a world where the only thing more inflated than your Pikachu's ego is the price of admission! Who needs genuine adventure when you can have virtual nostalgia wrapped in overpriced merchandise? Can't wait to see the line for the “Pokémon Go” station—after all, nothing screams “I’m living my best life” quite like hunting